Notes From Illusions – Part II



It’s an endless darkness . Sunk in melancholy nothing but pain within a grief .

How can days be so strange ? how can I be so desperate ? I thought I was hope , I thought was strong , but it’s really too hard to be strong .

Every where I turn to there’s only more troubles and disappointments .

Tomorrow never comes and no matter how we wait for it ; today is today and tomorrow is nothing but tomorrow . I thought I was a step away from it . It turned out to be illusions .  Created by my own inner brain .

It reached to a moment that I believed and lived all this illusions .

How could I be so silly ? how could I let life drag me ? Instead of I running my life ; I let life run me !!!

Weakness I feel all over my body , I can’t handle anything .

What about the sunrise ? the blue skies  . What makes me cry when I see that all ? I just can’t smile . Maybe coz deep inside I know that I can’t enjoy them . I can’t enjoy the beauty of life. Instead I see them all dark . My tears are of blood . My hope is in vain . I lived it all – I lived by myself.

Life stabbed me in my back . And I have no intention to be stabbed again . So I decided not to live , not to live again . And not hope



What would anyone want ?

What makes us wake up everyday ?

What for ; we go on ?


Could it be illusions , dreams or hopes ?

Or Could it be just nothing ?


I dreamed a dream

And dreams are infinite

Infinite are unreachable


Sometimes it just doesn’t rain

Sometimes the days don’t go around

And sometimes all this is not true


I’ll close my eyes

And think in deep

But as I open

I wanna wake up

I want all this to be over

And to start all over again