Going Home



Falling Apart

In a dark place
In an empty place
In a place which ain't my life
In a place so quite
That darkness that made me bilnd
That emptiness that me alone
That life which is just not mine 

Co'z am now so sick
And falling apart
Co'z now am sad
And so can't smile 

Things go around
All around me
Things go about
And am in the mid 

And now things change
And I no longer make the world smile 

Sleeping with tears
Waking with fears 

And at the end i realize
That the world wants me to smile

And at the end i realize
That the world wants me to smile

I wonder why

This poem means alot to me . It won the best poem in a poetry site .
I wrote it with a person i called a friend.

I wonder if things could change
I wonder if life could just be
I wonder why ....
Why it have to be that way ?

When things aren't how they were
& when you are all alone
Coz that is how I was born

Whenever i try to look at the sun
It fades away never lookin back at me ..

Its like am stuck in this cage .. can't walk.. talk..
Its hard to breath and there's no escape ..

Depression has a limit but mine exceeded
And its even beyond misery

I wonder if life could just be
I wonder if things could change 

Am falling apart
With a wounded heart
Nothing is left but a tear drop
And the lonely Me..
And the broken Me 

My heartbeat lonely and sad..
Hardly beating the life in me ..
Even dreams have forsaken my fantasy

I try to imagine a perfect place
But my imagination fails in every try ..
Some one just tell me why

As I wonder why ..
Why it has to end that way .

Life goes on…



Nurses see people in their worst conditions of time. Those who are severely ill , amputated leg or arm, fractured, diagnosed with cancer or with uncured diseases . Patients who are dying ; nurses witness all that and here we give not only nursing care but also emotional support . Though we may feel sad , tears that can’t leave our eyes , empathy & fear of losing them yet we have to do it.

Let me share with you a story of a newly graduated nurse , Betty, hired at a surgical ward. There ; where she met John  7 year old boy with an head injury from a traffic accident . He was on a ventilator , monitor & many machines, semi conscious and stable. When betty asked about his family or relatives they mentioned that they rarely visit him. Betty not only saw all that but saw a young child ; neglected, alone, depressed and  in a cage.

Whenever she rubbed his hand gently he moved it mildly as if he felt it, when she sang for him his eyes tired moving towards her as if he was saying ”  Thank you for being around , for singing for me when no one did ” . I can tell he was happy thought compared to normal kids this was nothing but to him its was .

Betty did all that with love & care . Days passed and John became so sick. Doctors thought that he may not make it any more. Until he passed away in October 9th 1999 . The night before his death betty saw him sick & yet couldn’t do anything more to help him but pray, she read some verses from the holy book as she held his hands. She was no longer a nurse at the moment but a human , but a mother , but a sister but a loving person.

It was a shock for her , even though everyone knew it. She couldn’t eat well for days , she couldn’t go to the work with passing by his room, she can’t see the patients without  remembering him.


He lived , though his life was a sorely tired. It happened calmly, on its own. The way night comes when the day is over.


Yea ! this is the life , so harsh . We have to move on because we will see many other clients like John . We ,nurses can’t be emotionless but we have to control it . We have to learn that is part of our job condolences and caring for death. Our job requires more of us. People go and come; just like how John’s room was occupied by another patient.

Days pass and life goes on.








The Dawn

bsmlh_27861e0de2“The Darkest Hour Is that before the Dawn “

No matter how dark the night might be , the dawn will eventually come . No matter how wrong the are , something may happen that changes it.

You just have to keep believing in it . I agree with you , there are many hard days .There are many obstacles .But nothing is always the same . I understand how hard it is when dreams don’t come true. When sun never shines, when the only , only raining cloud , rains on you .When you keep on crying and there is no one to wipe your tears.
You always wake up every morning and put a fake smile on your face but one day will come that you no longer can put that fake smile. That your no longer can hide your tears, one day it will show how your face is so sad, how your eyes are full of tears . The miserable days you have been through , the pain you live in .
Yea ! you can’t always hide it .


This is a poem written by me.. Hope you like it .
Sometimes you feel that
you want to die 
Sometimes you feel that
you are not yourself
Sometimes you feel
that this is another place
Sometimes things
don’tbe alright
Sometimes you even forget
how to smile
Sometimes dreams
don’t come true
Sometimes you badly
hate yourself
Sometimes you wish
if don’t even exist
Sometimes it’s even hard
to look around
Sometimes people
just forget about you.
Sometimes Sometimes
Sometimes you feel that