And So I had Cancer


I use to read in books that disease don’t differentiate between young or old; but now when I was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 25 I believed that fact.

I am the only son for my parents and I am the big brother to one little sister. Since the age of 10 and I became orphan as my father died of the same disease. Now , I inherited it.  It’s not cancer that I fear but it’s how my family will be without me. Being the only one who takes care of my old mother and my little 12 years old sister. How would they live without me ?

I wonder why doctors say that early detection of cancer can help save life. When the truth is you don’t know you have cancer unless it’s metastasized to other organs. Which is what  happened to me?  As the symptoms didn’t show and I wasn’t diagnosed until too late to intervene.  The fact of cancer is that you don’t have time ; you don’t have time to decide nor to take a breath . In a moment you might be alive and tomorrow – no one knows .

People and family looks in a sympathetic way , while doctors want a fast reply about your decisions and your friends everyone gives an opinion or  not to go for surgery others say ” Yes do it ! “.   I got confused and to some point I didn’t what to do nor who to guide me . Whatever it was ; it has to be done fast.  Meanwhile ; the image of my father when he was suffering after the he undergone multiple surgeries was haunting me .

I use to hear nurses saying in empathy how unlucky I was ! Being a handsome young man and having cancer. Everything is destiny . Before we were born our lives were written, I am Muslim , and I believe in Allah and that He would guide me and be the most merciful .

So that day the doctor was waiting a reply from me whether I agreed for surgery or no. I made a prayer and then I agreed. Whatsoever the consequences could be !  And if either ways we are dying ; I want to die trying .


” There are always a wings of hope “


Some Statistics:

–          Around 12.7 million new cancer cases were diagnosed worldwide in 2008.

–          The most commonly diagnosed cancers worldwide are lung, breast and colorectal cancers. The most common causes of cancer death are lung, stomach and liver cancers

–          Approximately 70% of cancer deaths occur in low- and middle-income countries.

–          One in 4 deaths in the United States is due to cancer.

–          The rate of death in cancer has also been increased in 2010


Sources of the statistics :

What Nursing Gave Us ?

A year passed just very fast. I didn’t notice that i was a nurse all that period. Maybe i wasn’t planning to stay as one for a long time – nor i was expecting to survive this period ; but I did !  I have seen alot , and  I have met many people . I can even remember each and every patient i had … some left me a wound that never heals and others left me an ever lasting smile .

When life takes away the most dear thing to your heart… make sure that it’s preparing you a lovely surprise. 

Nursing is the power to heal , the power to create whats lost within those patients , and the power to make them die peacefully . It’s never eacy to go through such emotions in a time – what if you go to work everyday and seeing this !  It could really be devastating…. but after all that’s what we do . And day by day we learn how to cope with it. Until one day it becomes a routine ; your patient might be dying and when your shift finishes , there might be your son’s birthday party waiting . We try to hold our tears , to control our emotions, and to put ur work aside and our life aside. Thus , life goes on .

We read through their eyes, we understand there pain but we can never feel their pain . We show empathy but never the sympathy . We hold their hand and rub their tears … we sing for them and so keep their strength . We give them what they might have lost until they recover and leave us smiling .



Facing the days…


 It was the weekend, and I was on morning duty. Unlike the rest of the days we only had 15 patients in the ward. Medical ward with 15 patients , that was like WOW !  and there was enough staff covering ; that each nurse  took only one or two patients. While I looked at the mirror as it was raining with that lovely cold wind breeze; the flashback started when I was back in high school . I remember that whenever teachers or friends asked me what would like to be in the future…? My answer was always one. I want to be among sick people . I want to help others. And here I am !

I can still remember when my mother wanted me to be an English teacher , I never had a second thought towards that for my answer was always “ NO “ . And I joined nursing , and I never regretted it . Not even in the worst times.

Every day passes with a great new experience to learn whether it’s in the professional side or the practical life ; because I learn something every moment. And am sure every nurse do .  You won’t imagine what we can learn from caring for the geriatric patients. How every unsaid expression counts ? How every smile makes difference? And How every touch heals a soul ? Not only that but what they give us is much more.

We have a different life outside our working hours , but once we are at work .. once we enter the hospital everything else ends  and we become totally devoted for our patients. We smile and laugh for our patients and we cry and pray for our patients … We Live for them !  Because to them; we are all they count on.

It changes our lives , we change the patient’s life. And we touch their hearts. That it heals all their wounds.  During my time in the hospital , I have realized that it’s the non- medical effect that heals the people. 

So , we keep facing the world.. and we as nurses we put  our lives on the line for sake of others; that is how we are and that is what we’ll  always be .  The world around us is just an opportunity for every nurse whether you are just starting , or been in the field for years or even a nursing student. There will be always much more to discover and find out .


Although there are times that we feel  like giving up , but I think that those are the moments that proves our strength most. We give hope and faith to others ; so we can’t lose them ourselves.  Cherish your days not only for what you are but for what you want in the future.



Moments You Wouldn’t Wish To Be A Nurse !!!

–  When you meet a 15 years old kid with a CRF ( Chronic Renal Failure ). He’s so cute and is smiling while you are taking a blood specimen .
–  When a 2 years old girl is kept NPO ( NOTHING PER ORAL ) and is crying for water. All I can give her as a nurse is a sips of water to wet her mouth and lips .
– When you meet a 24 years old young man diagnosed with a metastatic cancer spread all over his body . And you know he is not going to make it , but you still keep smiling and ask him ” Are you a fan of Real Madrid or Barcelona “, he smiles and replies “Am with Barca and we won yesterday the Claccico “
– When you see a mother coming every morning for her young daughter who has a congenital birth defect and she comes every morning for the last 14 years.
–  When a patient is  dying . All the family around are crying and there is nothing you can do  .
 dying patient
–  When a patient dies in your shift and you are the one covering him .
–  When a patients comes in complaining from a severe headache and doctors finds out that he has a malignant tumor in the brain .The patients then asks you  “Nurse what do my results show , what’s wrong with me ?” You can’t tell him because doctors restricted that until the relatives come and they talk to them first .
–    When a patient comes with a 2nd degree burns all over his arms and chest .I was curious about how it happened and why he didn’t run away from the fire …… when I looked around his room I saw a wheelchair near the bed.. The patient was on wheelchair on two years from a car accident.
–  When you one work in a cancer control centre and everyone that comes from patients , doctors, nurses and visitors  are all sad and depressed . I wondered ” Is it the cancer that have the people or the people who have cancer .”
–  When you meet a worker in the causality with an amputated leg  and is having am infection in the site . He can’t afford the treatment yet he was smiling and talking to me.
 cancer cchild
– When you meet a 9 years old pretty girl coming to receive a chemotherapy session.
Not everything that we meet in the hospital we can talk about. And by the end of the day you will feel so upset and filled with melancholy . You might not sleep and you may say this is the worst day in my work . But you go home and you sleep deeply , you may go out with you friends to have fun . And the next day comes and another sad day may come.
This is life .. and thappy patienthis is became part of our life and we adjust and move on. Because beyond all this sometimes we are able to bring the smile to those faces and we able to change things.  And about that worker with the amputated leg , we the nurses were able to collect the needed money for his medications and he received the health care required. And so is the end of the stories above some are sad end others are not .