Yes, 2013 is finishing . It’s closing up with the biggest pain that it caused me. No words can describe my grieve. The only fact is that the year is over nevertheless the scar is never heal.
2013 started with the illness of the my dad, while March 12th he died. April , May , June , July … and I am still in grieve; am still in pain . I can’t forget it only made me more lonelier . I remember him in my arms ; I remember closing his eyes like it was yesterday – so how can I forget !
I joined my work , everything was tense .. I had to keep to my fake smile . And started crying for no reason at night . I don’t know am I happy or upset. I don’t know how I feel any more towards many things around me. I even transferred from my area towards another departments … another busy department ! Why ? because I don’t want to have any free time to think .. thinking is so dangerous . Thoughts about life scares me , visions of dad haunts me. Everything is weird . Nothing is normal …
I lie by his grave praying for him . Dreaming about the short period that I was with him. Could it be worse?
And so fast years lapse… in a blink everything could end . Everything around you is prone to change ; to end . Nothing remains.
Consider loving the people around you more. Learn how to live simply . If you don’t like what you do , change it ? If you did a mistake , apologize ! If you love someone , say it ! Don’t leave anything for tomorrow … Because tomorrow never comes .
Hopes misguide us, it makes us think that we will live forever. Have a short term hope , and make your wishes true. Never let go what you love.
May the coming years bring something different . May your lives be always brighten with love and care of dear people. May 2014 be special for you all .